Listen, woman

That's the heading of my friend W's email reply to my inner turmoil right now: To Bangkok, or not to Bangkok. He always says Hey, girl, and never Yo, woman. I'm getting old. Or, as Butasnachucks succinctly pointed out, I am old. So I can do what I please. Which is technically true. But it has also given rise to some things I did not consider in the first place.

The Cons:

• I don't own a credit card.  Sniff, sniff.
• It's smack in the middle of things, literally. It's midterm in school. It's right in the heart of the rainy season. I'll be arriving on a Wednesday, so that means I can't bodily drag my friend to accompany around the city and yell, Look, temples! Not that I'll be doing that a lot.
• I'll be alone, basically, on my effing birthday. I really have no kwangs with that.
• I'll be open target for terrorists and muggers. There were reports of young backpacker girls who got raped and kidnapped in India, I think. Why the hell it shouldn't happen in Bangkok, I don't know.
• It's a waste of money. I could buy a tv and a dvd player for that amount.
• I've never been out of the Philippines. If I get trapped in a country whose alphabet I can't even understand, I'll be doomed.

Now why I should really do this:

• Even if I don't own a credit card, I do have an international ATM card, which I got precisely because I thought I'd be doing some travelling. Will that do?
• Even if it's smack in the middle of things, so what? It's not like I'm really abandoning everything. It just so happened that there's a holiday, there's Wednesday and we don't have classes on Wednesdays, it's a long weekend. I figure if I depend on other people's free days, I won't get around to doing anything.
• And yes, I'm getting old. I should be able to do this.
• I already have the promise that W will take time out for me. The alone thing in the middle of the week will be good for me.
• I deserve this.  I've been delaying this trip from last year, and if I delay this some more, I won't be able to do it anymore. I'll be kicking myself the same way as like I kicked myself for not pushing for my papers last years when I should have gone to France instead of moping around and getting depressed for some missed opportunities. Feh. Now or never.
• I rarely watch tv anymore. Although I would like the dvd player. Then again, it's my money. My choice how to waste it.
• As for terrorists, we have them here. What difference would it make. I don't think they'd single me out.
• Even if I can't understand Thai, I think I can manage. I spent two years or so of my life going around places in the Philippines whose languages I also couldn't understand. Well, maybe just a bit, and I never really got it down pat. Sure, sometimes I got lost, but it never stopped me before. And I always found my way back to the hotel or wherever.

So there. I'm sitting on my hands still. I haven't done the footwork for this and I still have to shop for the best deals around for the airfare and all. But I'll get to it. I have 3 weeks to iron this out. Hmm...What to do, what to do.