Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer never quite rose to my expectations, and that was already zero to low in the first place. Still sucked nevertheless.
The opening credits reminded me of the Spider-Man movie. There wasn't really a story, and you keep wishing the promised apocalypse would arrive so we could all go home. Oh sure, they tried to humanize superheroes, threw in wedding anxiety, the desire to be 'normal' and have the ability to raise a 'normal' family, but it's all been done and better. Even a recent TV viewing of The Incredibles was more exciting that this movie.
The movie had spectacular special effects--it succeeded to make Jessica Alba terribly unattractive. In general, at least for me, smarts trumps good looks, but Mr. Fantastic doesn't really generate an iota of attraction. Invisible Woman and the Human Torch actually had more chemistry romantically; if they breached the line of incestuous relationships, that would have made for a better story.
My favorite scene was just before the botched wedding: a bouncer stops this old man from entering the premises and asks for his name. "I'm Stan Lee, check the list," the old man says. But the bouncer still throws him out. "That's probably the high point of the entire movie," The Girl says. We laughed, albeit uneasily.
It turned out that she was right.
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